{"id":4345,"date":"2020-04-06T16:31:34","date_gmt":"2020-04-06T14:31:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bullesbygundula.com\/?p=4345"},"modified":"2020-04-08T15:58:42","modified_gmt":"2020-04-08T13:58:42","slug":"big-hug","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bullesbygundula.com\/en\/big-hug\/","title":{"rendered":"Big hug"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"http:\/\/bullesbygundula.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/IMG_2484.jpg\"\/<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

As all my friends know, I love giving people big hugs. I like the physical contact with the people I love, I like giving a hug to someone who is in distress and I like giving a celebratory hug too. Any excuse, in fact.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One day I was giving a coaching class and I saw that one of the participants looked a bit dubious, as if he were struggling. Once we’d finished what we were doing, I asked him if he needed a hug. He looked down at me from a great height and said. “I’d have thought that you need it more than me, don’t you?”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Upset, I quickly turned away and found someone else who needed a hug. And it was then that I began to understand. He was right. I’d asked him if he wanted a hug not for HIM but for ME. I had projected my need on to him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A bit later on, I told him what I’d discovered – after all, this was a coaching session, the perfect place to have this kind of discussion – and he explained to me how he worked it out: “Whenever my father wanted to eat, he said to my mother – darling, the children are hungry!!”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What about you?  Do you project any of your needs onto someone else?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As all my friends know, I love giving people big hugs. I like the physical contact with the people I love, I like giving a hug to someone who is in distress and I like giving a celebratory hug too. Any excuse, in fact. One day I was giving a coaching class and I saw that one of the participants looked a bit dubious, as if he were struggling. Once we’d finished what we were doing, I asked him if he needed a hug. He looked down at me from a great height and said. “I’d have thought that you need it more than me, don’t you?” Upset, I quickly turned away and found someone else who needed a hug. And it was then that I began to understand. He was right. I’d asked him if he wanted a hug not for HIM but for ME. I had projected my need on to him. A bit later on, I told him what I’d discovered – after all, this was a coaching session, the perfect place to have this kind of discussion – and he explained to me how he worked it out: “Whenever my father wanted to eat, he said to my mother – darling, the children are hungry!!” What about you?  Do you project any of your needs onto someone else?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[2289],"tags":[2655,2362,2654,2656],"yoast_head":"\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\t\n